Hello world...
Been sometime since i came to update on my happenings and rants..

Life is still going on as usual...it always is...never stopping for anyone...

Went hospital with my mom and dad on Monday..it is only then i came to realise..mount elizabeth really charge dam high for the ward and treatment...and the ward isnt all as peaceful as it seems..services too..wasnt as excellent as it claimed.
We can actually spend more than 10minutes waiting for a pillow and when we ask the nurse wheres the pillow..., she can took it out from a cupboard nearby...
The person still tell us he will get for us a pillow.and he disappeared.
It is aso only then that i realised how much pain there is for the treatment..and how much courage is required.
thanx to him..for fetchin me n jie fu n jie n lucky back home after a full day @ hospital with my dad.I know he's tired...

Yesterday, Tuesday, he was down with throat pain and tiredness i think...went home ard in the afternoon..he even offered to let me drive his car...but too bad i m still unconfident of myself plus i duno how to park...thus didnt take the car from him.

Went to find him after work...took the transport to tampines..after which mrt to pasir ris and bus to his hse..bought ju hua cha and barley for him coz he's quite heaty...and bought ard 7 doughnuts..with the thought of giving his family eat...but all ended up in his fridge.
n 2 with me

proceed home ard 1045 with his mom...coz she wanted to take disc from her parents in law there..after which we went to selegie there to have teochew porridge...one fish tail..one vege...one pork..one lala...one salted egg..2 rice n 1 porridge and 1 coke...total up ard 25.50...and its not that big plate aso.....her mom treat..den after which walk over to buy douhua..but douhua was out of stock le..too late + sell finish ..thus settle for a grass jelly drink..
On the car, her mom was telling him when her operation is and askin him to fetch her...after which..she continues...call her elder sis out together aso..when we go shopping or watch movie blah...coz scared she will anyhow think and her fren like 2 only.wellx...not that i dun wan ask her out or wad...but ...we dun even have sometime for ourselves.....but again...wad can i say..i can onli keep quiet.
it's like askin elder sister out for shoppin, watch movie...askin younger sister out ktv coz she aso very cham...very tied down...den fetchin elder bro back coz area that area...fetchin mom back from work...helpin auntie with groceries...wellx...so where's our own time?
noone say that i very cham also?
I know..his family are all gd...all of them gd to me too...i m not complaining abt helping them or wad...wad i m askin for, probably, is just some free time to ourselves...not a single day i can go out with him full for 1 day..alone me n him..happili..its either there's errands to run, or his face will be so tired and his face will be so sianx and we'll be walkin without talkin.
i duno how long will this continue..
21st Aug, 22nd Aug or anywhere near these dates...are the days where i feel dam insecure...bcos its his ex birthday.I've been wondering if he will be meeting his ex or sending her sms or even callin her...I duno..i'm afraid to ask.I'm scared its true and i will end up hurting myself.
So now i can only think and think.
Sighx.so tired.feel like slpin...
Update next time..
-wishin-

Been quite a long time since i come to do any updates on my life...happenings and etc...
A lot of stuffs actually happened these few weeks and months...





Let me recall...Jason have been back from Australia and we all met up to have a simple dinner @ cathay ...people present were :Dap,Mingli,Wai wai,Justina, me, Alfred, Jason.


The feeling is so nice...as though everyone is back to chat...catching up with each other after we parted off at Australia after our studies...Jason hasnt change much , still himself..As for me n him...things are gettin from bad to worst...we can be quarrelin at a frequency of like 2 days once or worst, 1 day once..





However for now, things are somehow getting better...I do hope it's not temporary like last time again..but I also dun dare to hope too much too..Daddy's condition wasnt getting on well after the chemo that time...another cell ard 2cm + was found and thin thin cells are found too.Hopefully the medicine will help out with it and control it..Felt quite depressed yesterday...





The last weekend went sim lim square...before going out of my house, i actually asked my mom wad she wanna buy.She replied with 50 cdrs...Knowing that she's doin the so call "GOOD STUFFS" again..i just say her back..."for your those so call shi xiong again?duno why u everytime help them buy and not they burn themself...100 pieces all that..."And then guess wad..?I am being accused of "zhao nie" if u all know wad it means...according to her so call BUDDHISM.But wad happen in the end?I still buy for her.It is SO CLEAR that her shi xiong all that is just using her to burn all stuffs...even my sister and brother are lazy to help her.and halo...my mom is not that power in computer?all her questions will come to me and end up i help?





but also..end up i get all this SHIT...nvm abt that...passed her the CDS and the next mornin..she wan quarrel again with me.This time i just in kitchen eating my medi...wad she tell me?Those cds are those chanting for 7th month etc..u like that say will add to the sins..then all those gd karmas will all gone.HALO...that's only ur thinkin and i think we do have our thinkin too?she's only makin mi more n more disappointed in her so call BUDDHISM.still...nvm abt tat...when i come home?wad did i get u knoe...another round...now sayin i always late home..when i was at home after work on mon..tue i aso reach home b4 11pm which is earlier than usual...just a dinner and movie at westmall.den the blaming starts say i dun care my father.WTH is tat?





I asked my sister hows my father...wad ans did i get..?like this lor


I asked my mother hows my father...wad ans did i get?aiya..dun ask already la.very fan la


I did tok to my dad and ask abt hows he's feeling.I did tried to stay at home to accompany him but he's at the horse racing there...so end up i m just an idiot helpin them look after their dog while they go out happili.And know wad?not i dun wan care...am i given a chance to?i wunt even know when my dad is staying in hospital for chemo and such..noone bother to inform mi.





everyone just blame stuffs on me..BUDDHISM?dam selfish teachings?onli living in their own life...tinkin that they are the only 1 with the correct views and everyone shld accept them.haha...For wad i wan treat them gd when everytime i m just a vent anger pot to them!?Noone listen to me tok at all..noone...no matter if it's advices from real life cases or wad..there r more to say..but i'm juz tired of typin it..


Work is getting more n more busier and stressful..


Everything is just getting more n more stressful...Even my colleagues say i look like ghost=.="


I just duno when all these will make mi collapse...


am realli dam tired..

New Lancer 2.0L